How Emotional Intelligence Can Help You Succeed

What is Emotional Intelligence?

Emotional intelligence is the ability to identify, process, regulate and manage our emotions, as well as the emotions of those of people around us. And believe it or not, understanding the transformative power of emotional intelligence can have far-reaching effects on all aspects of our lives.

We are all familiar with cognitive intelligence – commonly termed IQ (intelligence quotient) – which measures our ability to comprehend, remember, reason and think abstractly. By contrast, emotional intelligence focuses on skills that promote self-awareness, self-regulation, communication, and healthier interactions with others, as well as other characteristics such as:

• Self-actualization
• Emotional expression
• Assertiveness
• Self-regard
• Independence
• Empathy
• Social responsibility
• Flexibility
• Stress tolerance
• Impulse control
• Optimism
• Mentoring
• Teamwork

Some researchers have studied the role if emotional intelligence within our overall intelligence and its connection to our thoughts. This is includes John D. Mayer and his team, who developed the four-branch model of emotional intelligence. This model says emotional intelligence is comprised of four things:

1. Perceiving emotions of self and others. This also involves the ability to identify emotions from body language.
2. Thinking and communicating feelings. This refers to the ability to utilize emotions to enhance thinking and communication.
3. Understanding emotional information. This represents the capacity to analyze emotional trends and outcomes.
4. Managing emotions to promote understanding and growth. This includes goal oriented emotional regulation.

Defining the Components

There are five essential components of emotional intelligence:

• Self-Awareness is the basis of emotional intelligence. It represents the ability to be attuned to our emotions and our reactions in different situations.
• Self-Regulation is the ability to control one’s impulses and reactions, to remain calm under pressure and adapt to change.

• Empathy represents our capacity to understand and relate to the feelings of others enabling deeper connections.

• Social Skills are crucial elements of emotional intelligence and they represent communication and collaboration skills.

• Motivation is driven by emotional intelligence and allows us to have a sense of purpose and to persist in the presence of challenges.

How to Improve Your Emotional Intelligence

Your emotional intelligence can be developed using various strategies that include the following:

• Practice mindfulness. Cultivating presence, attention and self-awareness will go a long way in recognizing your own feelings and emotions, understanding them and managing them from a non-judgmental place. You can do this by listening to your body, meditating, journaling, focusing on your breathing, practicing yoga, among others.

• Perform a self-evaluation. You can try to honestly and openly take a look at yourself accepting that you are not perfect and appreciating  that there are areas you can improve for your own wellbeing and that of those close to you.
• Learn to listen and observe others. Pay attention to people you speak and interact with, taking cues from their body language as well as from what they say. You can learn to interpret their emotions which will help you to interact in a more empathetic and effective manner.
• Observe your reactions and judgements of others. Try to put yourself in their situation and remain open to accepting their perspectives.
• Be open to collaborating and sharing with others. Self-confidence and humility can indeed go hand in hand. Be secure in your ability while also open to giving recognition to others. Allow others to succeed and rejoice with them.
• Take responsibility for your actions. Recognize your patterns of behavior and how you react to various situations. If you can examine your emotions you can learn to regulate them and stay calm. But if you recognize that you have reacted impulsively and hurt someone else’s feelings, apologize. This will allow you to grow and learn how your actions are affecting others.

The Impact of Emotional Intelligence

There are many benefits of developing and improving our ability to recorgnize and manage our emotions.

People with high emotional intelligence are able to develop better communication and understanding in their relationships. They have calm demeanors that helps them manage and reduce stress in challenging situations. They are self-aware and able to reflect and improve in most aspects of their lives.

High emotional intelligence also leads to accountability. People are able to accept their mistakes and to find solutions instead of reacting impulsively driven by negative emotions.

These individuals make exceptional leaders because they are able to communicate effectively, understand team members and inspire them. By self-regulating their own emotions, they can keep calm and make important decisions. They are also able to deal with conflicts in a constructive manner by listening empathetically to find an equally beneficial solution.

Higher emotional intelligence is also reflected by an ability to adapt to change and uncertainty. Emotional intelligence leads to resilience and allows people to tolerate painful and stressful situations while maintaining a positive outlook.

Intrinsic motivation is also enhanced by higher EI because goals and aspirations become clear through self-awareness. This allows people to be more confident, less defensive and better able to manage criticism.

Here at the BEE ME Project, emotions are one of the defining pillars in our holistic health model and part of our mission is to develop self-awareness. Connect with us to learn more about how we can support you.

Cultivating emotional intelligence is a lifelong process, a process that can start slowly and be built over time, leading to a more fulfilling and authentic life enhanced by healthy relationships.